Living Oblivious vs. Facing Your Demons

I went back to work today for the first time since the move.  I could definitely feel that a load of stress had been lifted...work didn't seem quite so tedious, nor did I dread going home.  When I got back to the condo, it was so pleasant to walk in and not have to deal with anyone but my cats.  The place was empty, quiet, mostly clean, and in a way-- inviting.

As I settled in for the night, I couldn't help but think that maybe this life is what I want.  Isn't that what anyone wants?  Independence?  Freedom?  Less stress?

But then I realized something- yes, this would be the life I would have if I didn't work on any of my problems (i.e. if I lived "obliviously").  That's one thing that this marriage has forced me to do-- face my demons and examine all of my own issues, as painful as they may be.

If I were to divorce my husband now, well, I'd enjoy the independence, freedom, and calm, but they would only last so long.  Deep inside, I would still have these emotional scars, coaddictive and addictive behaviors, and control issues to work on.  I know myself, and I know that if I cut ties with him completely, I would go about my life stifling all of the deep-seated issues...I would just put it off, ignore it, hope it goes away.  But the second I found myself in a another relationship, it would be deja vu all over again.

So I guess the options are:

1. Work on issues now and try to reunite with my husband once I have my shit straight;
2. Work on issues now and realize I don't want to be with my husband;
3. Leave my husband and ignore the issues, only to have them creep up in my life at a later point in time; or,
4. Leave my husband and ignore the issues, and avoid future romantic relationships at all costs because I will undoubtedly attract the same kind of man.

For now my focus is behind door number one.  I did not go into this separation as a time to contemplate the merits of the relationship; I went into the separation knowing that I needed to focus on myself (and that he needed to do the same) to see if we could work it out together in the end.

But the ignoring, the oblivion is so tempting.  Hell, I could live here as long as I want.  I can afford it.  It's a decent place.  My cats will (eventually) get used to it.  No headaches caused by "roommate" or "spousal" issues.  No fighting, no hurt feelings, no neediness.  It all sounds too good to be true!

However, I know that if I choose to ignore all of it, I would eventually end up lonely and (even more) depressed.  I'm already isolating myself from friends...I would end up the cat lady who dies in her apartment and whose cats eat her face off cause no one knows she's dead for days after she croaks.

So I guess there's something to be said for being married/in a committed relationship.  At least there's someone who knows when you're dead so they can keep the cats from devouring you.  Are there any other pluses you can think of?